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A communication expert who tries to help people improve their social skills and make friends anywhere. Read full profile. In this article, I would like to share with you 6 tips that will help you expand your social circles. Oftentimes, these are very open people and are easier to connect with than you think. They might not have the time to invest in a deep friendship with you, but they love to get to know more interesting people to add to their circle. A great habit to have is to always be meeting people that you can add to your circles. In reality, not all the people you meet will become your friends and not all your current friends will be around forever.
Ideally, you need to go to places where others are open to meeting new people as well. Examples might be trade shows, opening nights, galas, cultural or charitable events, seminars, and talks. Nothing hooks better than having a giver attitude. First, listen really to what they say and imagine if you were them; see the world through their eyes. Second, be willing to share stories, contacts, or quick advice on what people are talking about. This works on an unconscious level. You can portray a giver attitude in two ways. The first is about really listening to what they say, imagining the world through their eyes, and giving them your opinion on their stories and situations.
One of the fastest ways to boost your social life is to get involved in a community that has the type of people that you want as friends. This community should be in your local area and should hold social get-togethers once a month, or more. What you do is find one that you like, maybe on meetup. This works great because it makes you meet everyone, and because it establishes you as a giver of value.
Staying in touch is vital if you want to keep your social circles alive. You need to follow up with the people you just met, and catch up with existing friends. The challenge here is that we tend to get distracted and forget about it, and regret later on.
To solve this problem, you can create a weekly ritual, where you spend only one hour calling, texting, and messaging people. Just mark on your calendar a specific day and time, and do it every week. A great time to do it is Tuesday or Wednesday, as it gives you the opportunity to make plans with people for the weekend. Before you start investing more time on making friendsdo a little planning. Try to figure out what kind of people you want to hang out with. This is important because it allows your mind to quickly tell if a person you meet could be a great fit for you. Here are some qualities you can start with: giver, interesting, fun, ambitious, honest, loyal, curious, and reliable.
You can add others if you want, and you can also make a list of the activities you want to be doing with your future friends. I also recommend that you invest a bit of time learning about friendship and how it works. Eugene is Lifehack's Entrepreneurship Expert. He is the co-founder and creative lead of HighSpark, offering presentation training for companies. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body — your heartbeat has gone off the charts. Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.
If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside. Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:. The audience will notice you are nervous.
If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements. Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time: Advertising. Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience?
This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out. A sip of water will do the trick. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly. Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength. Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage.
One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure. Do I look funny? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose — contributing something of value to your audience. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.
This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart. There are two sides constantly battling inside of us — one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed? What if I forget what to say? All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy — a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is.
Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about.
One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech. However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.
Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content — a definite way to stress themselves out. Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Deing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.
One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation. In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice.
Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand. Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice — whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect! Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker. To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy.
Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member with a hopefully calming face and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others.
But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back. You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up.
You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself. As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation.
Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time. Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech: Advertising. Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:. Communication Relationships 6 Tips for Expanding Your Social Circles Paul Sanders A communication expert who tries to help people improve their social skills and make friends anywhere.
Share Pin it Tweet Share. More by this author Paul Sanders A communication expert who tries to help people improve their social skills and make friends anywhere.Looking to expand the circle
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I can listen to and understand someone talking about social contacts.